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Viola jokes are graet adult jokes a category of jokes which are directed towards violas and viola players. The jokes are thought to have originated from the 18th century when the part of the viola was very uncomplicated and often just a filler part, thus attracting musicians who were not usually very talented either musically or intellectually. Another reason is that viola players were often previously violinists who were not particularly talented and are therefore asked to play the viola, as violin parts are often more demanding. This led to a generally lower standard of violists, which meant that jokes were made about them.In Italy in the early 1700s, the following story occurred and it is thought that it was the origin of many viola jokes despite being a true story:The violinist Francesco Geminiani arrived in London in 1714, one of the many expatriate musicians who settled in England in the late seventeenth and early eighteenth centuries..... As a young man Geminiani was appointed head of the orchestra in Naples, where according to English music historian Charles Burney he was "so wild and unsteady a timist, that instead of regulating and conducting the band, he threw it into confusion", and was demoted to playing the viola.The jokes come in many different forms. Some of them are only understandable to musicians and people acquainted with musical terms, while others are meant to be understood for everyone, regardless of their musical knowledge. Some jokes make fun of the viola itself while others make fun of violists, while some jokes are in fact directed the opposite direction: effectively jokes to musicians who tell viola jokes.Musically related: What is the definition of a minor second? Two violists playing in unison.Non-musically related: How do you stop a violist from drowning? Take your foot off his head.Making fun of the viola: What is the difference between jumping on a trampoline and jumping on a viola? You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.Making fun of violists: How can you tell if a violist is playing out of tune? The bow is moving.Reverse viola jokes: Why are viola jokes so short? So violinists can understand them.Viola Expressions: "Oh My Viola!"These jokes have enjoyed wide publicity. They have been mentioned in such places as Alex Beam's Boston Globe column on These jokes are a continually-growing collection, and unfortunately, I can no longer remember which jokes I heard from whom. If you have ever told, emailed, or otherwise communicated to me a music joke, thank you.I also collect Jokes about other instruments.How is lightning like a violist's fingers?Neither one strikes in the same place twice.How do you keep your violin from getting stolen?Put it in a viola case.What's the difference between a violin and a viola?The viola burns longer.The viola holds more beer.You can tune the violin.We all know that a viola is better than a violin because it burns longer. But why does it burn longer?It's usually still in the case.
How do you get a viola section to play spiccato?Write a whole note with "solo" above it.How do you get a violist to play a passage pianissimo tremolando?Mark it "solo."What's the difference between a viola and a coffin?The coffin has the dead person on the inside.What do you do with a dead violist?Move him back a desk.What's the difference between a viola and a trampoline?You take your shoes off to jump on a poline.
What's the difference between a viola and an onion?No one cries when you cut up a viola.What's the definition of a minor second?Two violists playing in unison.What's the definiton of "perfect pitch?"Throwing a viola into a dumpster without hitting the rim.Why do violists stand for long periods outside people's houses?
They can't find the key and they don't know when to come in.What's the difference between a seamstress and a violist?The seamstress tucks up the frills.What's the difference between a washing machine and a violist?Vibrato.Why do so many people take an instant dislike to the viola?It saves time.How can you tell when a violist is playing out of tune?The bow is moving.How was the canon invented?Two violists were rying to play the same passage together.Why is playing the viola like peeing in your pants?They both give you a nice warm feeling without making any sound.Why is a viola solo like a bomb?By the time you hear it, it's too late to do anything about it.Why is a viola solo like premature ejaculation?Because even when you know it's coming, there's nothing you can do about it.Why do violists leave their instrument cases on the dashboards of their cars?So they can park in "handicapped" parking places.If someone mistakes them for mafia, they might get some respect.Why don't violists play hide and seek?Because no one will look for them.Why do violists smile when they play?Because ignorance is bliss and what they don't know can't hurt them.Why shouldn't violists take up mountaineering?Because if they get lost, it takes ages before anyone notices that they're missing.What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a crushed viola in the road?Skid marks before the skunk.How do you get a violin to sound like a viola?Sit in the back and don't play.Play in the low register with a lot of wrong notes.If you throw a violist and a soprano off a cliff, which one would hit the ground first? (two answers)The violist. The soprano would have to stop halfway down to ask directions.
Who cares?A conductor and a violist are standing in the middle of the road. which one do you run over first, and why?The conductor. Business before pleasure.What's the most popular recording of the William Walton viola concerto?Music Minus OneWhat do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?Everyone is happy when the case is closed.What is the range of a Viola?As far as you can kick it.What do a SCUD missile and a viola player have in common?They're both offensive and inaccurate.Why are violas so large?It's an optical illusion. It's not that the violas are large; just that the viola players' heads are so small.What's the difference between a chain saw and a viola?If you absolutely had to, you could use a chain saw in a string quartet.
What is the definition of a cluster chord?A viola section playing on the C string.Why do violists get antsy when they see the Kama Sutra?All those positions!If you're lost in the desert, what do you aim for? A good viola player, a bad viola player or an oasis?The bad viola player. The other two are only figments of your imagination.
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Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
Great Adult Jokes Adult Jokes Sms Funny Hindi English Photos Images Wallpapers
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